W
Upon my arrival at the small restaurant near Paul Rhys’s residence in central London, I find him dressed in all black, blending in with the dark walls. He has a thick journal in front of him and shares that writing daily is necessary to prevent his mind from exploding. With 30 years’ worth of material, it seems he could write a captivating memoir, filled with clever anecdotes about his co-stars and reflections on his journey from a working-class Welsh boy to a successful actor. As we chat, he opens up about his thoughts on his mother and the impending loss of his beloved dog. At one point, he asks if he can inquire about my own life, and I find myself divulging things I haven’t even confided in my closest friends.
Rhys has roles in two highly discussed movies this year: Saltburn by Emerald Fennell and Napoleon by Ridley Scott. He will also be featured in the BBC comedy-drama Men Up, which is based on the clinical trial that took place in Swansea in the 1990s and resulted in the creation of Viagra. Many have noted his career comeback, but he is uncertain about his feelings towards it. “Life is just a series of days passing by,” he explains. “But what is truly satisfying is having the opportunity to work with talented and influential directors.”
The actor appears to have relished the excitement surrounding both of his recent films. His role as a reserved but commanding butler in Saltburn has sparked debates. Rhys believes director Fennell intentionally created a polarizing film and he speaks highly of her. Similarly, his portrayal of the cunning Talleyrand in Napoleon has received criticism, particularly in France. Yesterday, a French actor friend texted him praising his performance. Rhys reacted with a questioning expression and a smile, surprised by the positive feedback.
In the film Men Up, the actor discusses the unique chance to play a character in his own social class. This is a change from his usual roles as nobles and vampires, which could be attributed to his tall stature and pale complexion. His character, Tommy, is a homosexual man dealing with erectile dysfunction. Without giving too much away, the film is set in a time period where homophobia is prevalent and Tommy is forced to hide his true identity in order to participate in a medical trial, facing terrible discrimination as a result.
Beforehand, Rhys prepared by reading, consulting with a sexual dysfunction expert, and conversing with multiple men. “I had a conversation with a gay man, and at that particular time, the significance of virility in the gay community was extremely prevalent. Without the institution of marriage or the anticipation of a long-term relationship as prevalent as it is now, one’s sexual prowess becomes their main currency. Thus, for Tommy to be impotent in that world, he feels like a failure and not a true man. This conversation shed light on the suffering associated with this struggle.”
Out of the five main characters, the emotional consequences of being unable to perform sexually are significant. Rhys acknowledges this, stating that there is a lot of societal pressure on men in this aspect. He also comments on the obsession with the male genitalia and how it reduces sex to just that one physical aspect. He expresses concern about the impact of pornography, recalling an incident where young boys were exposed to it and how it can influence their minds.
He claims that he was not exposed to pornography until he reached the age of 24 and had a limited understanding of sex. Despite having a reputation as a womanizer during his time at Rada, he had never even kissed anyone at that point. This realization was a stark contrast to how others perceived him and it has influenced his relationships ever since. He admits to having had very few sexual partners, which goes against societal expectations for men to be promiscuous.
Rhys identifies as queer. He believes that growing up, it was difficult for him to come to terms with this aspect of himself. However, he is grateful that the term queer is now widely used and accepted by younger generations, as he believes it resonates with many individuals. Russell T Davies, the producer of Men Up, advocates for only gay actors to portray gay characters. Rhys acknowledges the strong argument behind this belief, as in the past, gay individuals were often marginalized and denied the opportunity to play straight roles. He is relieved that society has mostly moved past this prejudice and the need for individuals to hide their sexuality.
However, he also states: “An artist should have the freedom to experiment. I believe it’s a downfall if you’re limited to only portraying yourself. From the start, I was putting on a facade – I had to appear sophisticated, I had to embody Beethoven, or some sort of immortal figure. Politically, there is a part of me that advocates for allowing gay men to authentically portray their sexuality, but that doesn’t mean a straight man is incapable of doing so.”
Bypass the advertisement for the newsletter.
after newsletter promotion
According to him, he is generally opposed to strict categorizations of sexuality. His most significant romantic relationship was with a woman, Arkie Whiteley, who passed away in 2001 at the age of 37. It took him a considerable amount of time to overcome his grief. He was not interested in forming another bond with anyone for a long time. He feels somewhat embarrassed discussing it, as his story is more about abstinence than anything else, but he is unsure of how it came to be. His troubled childhood, lacking in love and filled with trauma, has played a role in shaping his outlook. He believes that without a foundation of consistent, supportive love during upbringing, it is challenging to find it later on.
When Rhys was young and living in Neath, he did not aspire to become an actor. Instead, he dreamed of being like David Bowie. His mother was a cleaner and dropped out of school at a young age, while his father worked for a gas pipe company. Rhys recalls going on school outings to a coalmine and factory, where he was shown what his future could look like. However, he knew that was not what he wanted. He describes his school experience as terrible, with a lot of mistreatment and aggression from both students and teachers. He felt like there was no hope and the teachers were cruel.
The home environment was also filled with unhappiness. It was dysfunctional, as his parents did not communicate with each other for an entire year, and neglectful. Rhys skipped school for two years and no one took notice. However, he had a strong love for reading. After being inspired by some cowboy books and their tales of self-sufficiency, he wrote a letter pretending to be his mother and sent it to the local education authority, stating that she had a “very bright child” who needed to be transferred to a better school. The plan was successful.
Rhys had a similar experience to Rada. While in London for a concert, he noticed the drama school through the fogged-up windows of a doubledecker. This sparked a desire within him and he thought, “I want that, what do I need to do to get it?” Despite the pressure that came with it, he was able to win a scholarship to Rada. However, this sudden change in his accent raised questions from people back home. In those days, sounding middle class was necessary to land leading roles. When he completed his studies, his mother refused to watch him perform, saying “I’m not going up there to watch you make a fool of yourself,” as Rhys imitates her.
Rhys always felt inadequate at his position at Rada. He admits, “I was always scared. I may not have shown it, but I was.” Even to this day, he continues, “I still live in constant fear. If you weren’t raised with a sense of entitlement, as the middle and upper classes are, nothing external can alter that. I will forever feel inferior. Every time I take on a new job, I wonder, ‘Why did they choose me?'”
Following his role in Rada, he quickly achieved success in the 1990 film Vincent & Theo directed by Robert Altman, where he portrayed the brother of Van Gogh. Both he and Tim Roth, his co-star, were sought after by Hollywood. While Roth embraced the opportunity, Rhys felt he couldn’t simply rely on a lucky break. Instead, he returned to the theatre, which he describes as both grueling and intense, but also fantastic. He has received wide acclaim for his performances as both Hamlet and King Lear. He’s not sure if he would have been considered leading man material, as he always saw himself as quirky and could easily switch between being passably good-looking and grotesque. He found himself more comfortable in the grotesque roles.
On Tuesday, Rhys will be celebrating his 60th birthday. Despite his age, he still looks youthful, almost as if he could be a vampire. While he has been successful in his career, he has also had personal growth. In the past, he struggled with his identity, but he has been able to overcome this as time has passed. He is now focused on moving forward. As he grows older, he is learning how to navigate this new stage of life. He doesn’t want to fight the aging process, but he still wants to be involved and engaged. This means keeping up with current music and films, as it is his passion to be involved in things that are relevant in the present moment.
-
On December 29th, Men Up will be airing on BBC One.
Source: theguardian.com
