Football Daily | Thomas Tuchel and a whole lot of froth about working from home

OUT OF OFFICE

A TV cutaway shot as old as televised football itself. A top-division game, a lingering shot of the stands and the posh seats and there in overcoat, aside some simpering dignitary or other, is sat the England manager. Cue Kenneth Wolstenholme: “There’s Alf Ramsey, perhaps wondering if Sheffield Wednesday’s Johnny Fantham should be recalled to repeat his Owls goalscoring feats for England. Though perhaps West Ham’s Geoff Hurst might get the call.” From Brian Moore to Martin Tyler, “Motty” to “Clive” to Peter Drury’s Super Sunday’s poetry recitals, it’s all part of the routine. An England manager should be seen and not heard and sometimes spotted leaving early to beat the traffic on the M6. An England manager should know their Toddington from their Watford Gap, their Pease Pottage from their Knutsford, and be able to quote the price of a Wildbean Cafe meal deal without looking it up for their expense claims. An England manager is a knight of the road, forever clocking up the mileage in their speedy saloon, unstinting in their efforts to find the next Kalvin Phillips, the one player who can unlock a team’s potential.

Until now. Frothy reports this week suggest Thomas Tuchel, the current England men’s manager and an actual German, is betraying this tradition. OK, you might have seen Tactics Tommy’s cap in the stands a fair bit since his 1 January start date but the word is he’s been taking time off. Tuchel missed the entire third round of the FA Cup on 11 and 12 January and then three whole Premier League rounds of matches. Remember, Sven Göran-Eriksson and Fabio Capello both lived in London and were happy to attend games. Though perhaps that isn’t so compelling an argument considering the end results …

Last weekend, Tuchel attended Bayer Leverkusen against Bayern Munich rather than a match in England, his excuse being Harry Kane. One august publication has even published a full dossier on where Tuchel has been seen and not seen. On Sunday, he missed Tottenham and Manchester United serve up a potboiler, passing up the chance to see Harry Maguire, James Maddison and Djed Spence as starters before Archie Gray came on as a late sub. An FA statement groaned: “Thomas has attended 17 matches – both in England and abroad – to watch English players since he joined us in January, and is working full-time to assess players for his first squad announcement next month.”

Worse, the suspicion that Tuchel has been … working from home, the kind of practice considered an indictable-only offence by the likes of Big Sir Jim Ratcliffe, certain right-wing politicians whose business interests lie in commercial property and those Fleet Street thunderers who usually file their bile from French chateaux, Dubai or poolside at Palm Beach. Coincidentally, Tuchel’s home these days is in Germany after post-Brexit regulations – and Todd Boehly’s axe – prompted him to move back from Surrey. Sarina Wiegman does OK, considering she lives in the Netherlands, right? Worst, Tuchel’s first game – against Algeria – isn’t until 21 March. More froth to follow.

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QUOTE OF THE DAY

“I’m feeling very good. In my head, everything is fine. I don’t feel unstable in the knee. I need to get strength in the quads and everything. That’s most important” – Football Daily hopes everyone is enjoying Manchester City’s hiatus from world domination, because Rodri’s return from serious knee-knack appears to be going smoothly. Good news for him and Pep Guardiola, not so good for anyone else (including City’s Nico ‘mini-Rodri’ González).

FOOTBALL DAILY LETTERS

I loved the picture of Jude Bellingham seeing red from yesterday’s Quote of the Day, although I still can’t shake the notion that the real reason for his comically astonished fizzog is that Vinícius Jr has just revealed the true age of Luka Modric to Birmingham’s finest export” – Colin Reed.

Gosh, it must have been 40 years ago when I wrote (yes, a letter) to the great Patrick Barclay. I’d railed against a totally unnecessary change of team colours (memory thinks it was those serial offenders Aston Villa). I must have included my work phone number because he rang me (after a journalist’s liquid lunch) and totally agreed with me. Others in the personnel office of Lincolnshire county council neither shared my excitement nor understood the seriousness of a proper football reporter actually ringing me! And then agreeing with me. RIP Patrick” – Ian Dovey.

As a long-suffering Bristol Rovers fan, your photo of Bert Tann retrieving his golf ball from a stream (yesterday’s Memory Lane, full email edition) reminded me that he was our manager when I was growing up. This prompted me to do a bit of research and, to my surprise, I found out he managed them for 18 years but was only their second longest serving manager. By the way, when I started supporting Rovers they were in the bottom half of Division Three. Sixty odd years later they’re still there. The photo could be a metaphor? Rovers groping for success?” – Andy Smith.

I was amazed to see the item on Bert Tann. As a Bristolian I remember him as long-term manager of Rovers in the 1950s and 1960s, when he had a policy of ‘no buy, no sell’, relying on recruiting local talent. Imagine any club trying that these days. It wasn’t a wildly successful policy, but as a Bristol City supporter I was OK with that” – David Sage.

Send letters to [email protected]. Today’s winner of our prizeless letter o’ the day is … David Sage! Terms and conditions for our competitions – when we have them – can be viewed here.

RECOMMENDED LOOKING

Given the world, we all need to find some joy in football – heck reader, you’re working your way through this tea-timely email – so here’s David Squires embarking on a plan to do just that.